In and out of bliss

The sour taste
Of everything you can't have
The sweet flavor of satisfaction
Without promise of tomorrow

The fear causing desperation
The impulse to leave
With or without you
My soul is moving on

To turn away
To forget
To exclaim, "I don't need you,
I can live without you"

As the years fly by
As I get older
Goodbye gets easier
And colder

Can I live with you
Do you fit my future
With your past ghosts
And feelings and hurt
I suppose no one will
No one but a baby
Comes with no scars

Can I live with who you are
How you think
What you do, what you say
How you operate
Can I survive in your world
The way you love
Am I happy with what you give
I don't know

And the sour taste in my mouth
The bittersweet memories
Of an assassin, a double agent
I wonder if it's really you
That I'm giving my love to
Or a lost wolf
Using my soul as refuge
Are you hiding inside me
Am I paradise to you
Do you vacation in my heart
Am I your escape from "hell"

I binge on impulsive thoughts
I wonder if I should tell you
Makes me sick to forget you
I wonder if you can see
The road is ending

But it must be done
I'm brushing the sour taste
From my heart
Your sweet flavor from my tongue
I don't need it
I can live without it

A.M